It's the first Mehring Monday of the New Year!

Featured in this week's column:




Also, my true feelings for Pamela Hensley are revealed along with my cursory knowledge about baseball as presented through the lens of two classic Science Fiction television shows.

Only posting this to reference one of my favorite movies

Brewers’ Braun to open restaurant in Lake Geneva

Milwaukee Brewers outfielder Ryan Braun is part of an ownership group that is opening a fine-dining restaurant in Lake Geneva.

The Ryan Braun Tavern and Grill will be open in late November or early 2010 in an existing restaurant space that is being extensively renovated, said Nez Balelo, Braun’s Los Angeles-based agent. Balelo declined to disclose how much Braun is investing in the project, saying he is part of a group that includes several business executives from Chicago and Lake Geneva.

I only have advice to pass along from a great movie that I make sure to watch at least once a year during the season.

The Duke: What are you doing?

Jack: What am I doin'? Arithmetic.

The Duke: Arithmetic? Maybe I can help you. I am an accountant.

Jack: I was thinkin', after I turn your ass in and collect my money...I'm gonna open up a coffee shop.

The Duke: How much are you getting for me?

Jack: That's not any of your concern. But I'll tell you just to tell you. A hundred thousand.

The Duke: A hundred thousand? Would you take a hundred thousand to let me go?

Jack: Not by a long shot.

The Duke: Two-hundred thousand?

Jack: I never took a payoff in my life, and I won't start with someone like you.

The Duke: Why not?

Jack: Because you're a [redacted] criminal. You deserve to go where you're goin', and I'm gonna take you there. If I hear any more [censored] out of you, I'm gonna bust your head...put you back in that [redacted] hole...and I'm gonna stick your head in the toilet bowl and make it stay there.

The Duke: I have to tell you, a restaurant is a very tricky investment. More than half of them go under within the first six months. If I were your accountant, I'd strongly advise you against it.

Jack: You would? You're not my accountant.

The Duke: No, if I were your accountant...

Jack: I told you, I took you out here...

The Duke: No, I'm just saying that it's a very tricky business...and if I were your accountant, I would strongly advise you against it...as an accountant.

Jack: You're not my accountant.

The Duke: I realize I'm not your accountant. I'm saying, if I were your accountant.

That last part translates better in the first 40 seconds of this clip...

Go over there

The latest This Week In Timber Rattlers Baseball is posted at The Daily Drink.

Topics included are:

• Spider-Man Villains
• Who I think would win in a fight between Liam Neeson's character in Taken and those goofs in Never Back Down
• Mandalay movie posters
• Jessica Alba

Well, she's not a topic...Just a picture

Oh, and Baseball, too.

Go. I've got work to do.

Mother's Day, 2009

A couple of years ago, I wrote an article for Play Ball! that coincided with Mother's Day. I wish that I had it on the computer that I've got with me on the road. That would make this posting easy. (Editor's note: But, when have I ever done anything the easy way? Right, Mom?)

It was about Lou Gehrig and his relationship with his mother. A part of it had to do with the way it was depicted in The Pride of the Yankees.

Here's the start of the movie with the interaction between mother and son from the wonders of YouTube.



Don't you want to be an engineer like your Uncle Otto?

Happy Mother's Day.

Channeling

As I was driving home from the Oshkosh Business Expo last night, I began to have a few thoughts. It began when it took me about ten minutes to scrape the snow/ice hybrid off the car.

I take that back, it actually began during the Expo when I received a call to let me know that the Appleton East at Oshkosh North basketball game I was scheduled to work had been postponed. This was to be the last broadcast on TWC Sports 32. But, now we won't be doing the game.

After the car had been mostly cleared, I started on the trek home. What normally would have taken 20 minutes, took over an hour and 15 minutes.

The snow had finally gotten to me and as I pulled into the carport of the trailer, I began channeling a speech from an 80's movie with a few alterations.


I'm not going to stand up here and give you a lecture about the values of snow and the change of seasons. I just have two simple words for you: No More.

As long as I'm here, I can promise you one thing: That I will do everything in my power to enforce my painfully simple rule of NO MORE!

I know what you're thinking. You gotta live with me and I gotta live with you. Well, it will be a whole lot simpler if you all join with me and say:

NO MORE!

Now, if you'll excuse me I have to go to the corner bar and build a pyramid out of shot glasses. Or go in to the ballpark and sell, sell, sell.

41 dies insquequo Oris Dies!

Babe! I've Got You Babe!*

First D.J.: Okay, campers, rise and shine, and don't forget your booties 'cause it's cooooold out there today.
Second D.J.: It's coooold out there every day. What is this, Miami Beach?
First D.J.: Not hardly. And you know, you can expect hazardous travel later today with that, you know, that, uh, that blizzard thing.
Second D.J.: [mockingly] That blizzard - thing. That blizzard - thing. Oh, well, here's the report! The National Weather Service is calling for a "big blizzard thing!"
First D.J.: Yessss, they are. But you know, there's another reason why today is especially exciting.
Second D.J.: Especially cold!
First D.J.: Especially cold, okay, but the big question on everybody's lips...
Second D.J.: - On their chapped lips...
First D.J.: - On their chapped lips, right: Do ya think Phil is gonna come out and see his shadow?
Second D.J.: Punxsutawney Phil!
First D.J.: Thats right, woodchuck-chuckers - it's
[in unison]
First D.J.: GROUNDHOG DAY!
Second D.J.: GROUNDHOG DAY!

It's Groundhog Day!

You want a prediction about the weather, you're asking the wrong Phil. I'll give you a winter prediction: It's gonna be cold, it's gonna be grey, and it's gonna last you for the rest of your life.

I'm a god. I'm not *the* God... I don't think.

This is one time where television really fails to capture the true excitement of a large squirrel predicting the weather.

I don't deserve someone like you. But If I ever could, I swear I would love you for the rest of my life.

Somebody asked me today, "Phil, if you could be anywhere in the world, where would you like to be?" And I said to him, "Prob'ly right here - Elko, Nevada, our nation's high at 79 today." Out in California, they're gonna have some warm weather tomorrow, gang wars, and some *very* overpriced real estate. Up in the Pacific Northwest, as you can see, they're gonna have some very, very tall trees.

I was in the Virgin Islands once. I met a girl. We ate lobster and drank pina coladas. At sunset we made love like sea otters. *That* was a pretty good day. Why couldn't I get that day over and over and over...

*Yes. This is a repost from 2007.